Sunday 4/23/23

Welcome Back! 

It's almost unbelievable that 4 years have passed since my last post. So much has happened, unfortunately most of it tragic. In the past four years I have lost both beloved parents under heartbreaking and emotionally exhausting circumstances, learned how to manage a global pandemic while working in healthcare, and have just existed in Survival Mode. Whew. I feel as if I have been carrying my grief and heartbreak and responsibilities like a metal suit that I cannot take off. It can make you stronger, but it can also wear you down with the exhaustion of it all. 

My mother passed away in October 2019, quite suddenly and traumatically and my father passed away from Alzheimer's in early January of this year, expected and yet much sooner than anticipated. I have started the year with yet another wave of grief, but also as a fresh start in a way that I did not anticipate, a "Mulligan" for my life. What do I do now? What do I want to do that I had put aside for the past 4 years? What do I want to leave behind? What do I want to do better? As a classic over-thinker (Monkey Brain!!), how do I use my powers for Good instead of Evil? Ha ha. 

I have remained in touch with the Uganda ITW (Imaging the World) Team via WhatsApp, overjoyed to find that my imagined bond of friendship was indeed real. They have all been so lovely and supportive, especially when the sudden illness and death of my mother caused me to back out of my last planned trip to Africa in 2019, and they have been equally supportive during the care and loss of my dad. I thought to myself that planning a return trip in 2024 would be something wonderful to look forward to and plan for... but then I spoke with the founder of ITW and by the end of the phone conversation I was preparing for Uganda and Kenya this year! Why wait until 2024? Would it change anything for the better to wait that long? I will grieve the loss of my parents for the rest of my life, but does that grief have to replace everything or anything? Why can't it coexist with my efforts to get my life back on track? My parents were so incredibly proud of my international volunteer work and loved going over every detail of my preparation for and return from these trips. The thought of doing this work without them is heartbreaking, but necessary for me on so many levels. So, off I go. In just 2 days. Yikes!

Thanks to the generosity of friends and family, along with rigorous fundraising, I have a volunteer account that has been sitting in the bank patiently waiting for me, which has easily covered the flight and additional expenses. I have numerous plastic bins filled with supplies that have been used in Haiti, Honduras and Uganda, all I had to do was dust them off and start sorting. On Tuesday, April 25th, I will board a 14+ hour flight to Dubai, then an additional 5.5-hour flight to Uganda, where I will spend a few days with a training team, then we will all fly to Kenya for an intensive 3-week training program we will be offering to 20 participants. Once completed, we will return to Uganda where I will spend a week visiting the Ultrasound School that has been completed since my last visit and catch up with changes and growth of ITW. I will spend some time in Dubai, visiting a dear friend that I met and maintained on my last visit, then home on May 30th. 

We are supposed to have Wi-Fi access while in Kenya and I hope to pick up my old habit of writing at the end of each day and sharing it with all of you. There is a significant change to this Blog format, you can no longer subscribe via email. What this means is that you will no longer receive notification that I have posted via your email, but you can access my blog at any time at monkeybrainmusings.blogspot.com 

I hope that you will check in and join me on this journey, and all future trips, I can't imagine doing this without you! 💗

Much love and appreciation, Jo (MB)